Psychology: Persevering... Even When Everyone Else is Quitting and Giving Up!

in #business6 years ago

Maybe it's just a sign of the times, but it often feels — at least to me — like the world expects everything to be "fast and easy." And when faced with something challenging (even though potentially very rewarding), a lot of folks start looking for "a quick and dirty shortcut," in place of doing things "properly."

And if results don't come fast enough? They are out of there...

Maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but it feels like a variation on "wanting the benefits, but without paying your dues."

Or Is it a Personality Thing?

Then again, maybe it's a personality thing.  Maybe it's "me," not "them."

Clover
Red clover in the sun

Even back in the day when I worked in Korporate Amerika, I was sort of known as "that guy" who would take on a "marginal loser" project and force it to succeed through sheer hard work and force of will.

When people ask me for advice about projects, blogs and social media, I tend to hone in on the reality that they seem to be operating from a perspective that it is "supposed to be easier" than it really is. And they end up ready to give up and pack it in before it has had a chance to succeed.

I look at some of my other web properties and blogs and online projects and realize that they are not better, more interesting, more unique, funnier, more charming or anything else than my competitors... and the truth (or at least part of it) is more that I have succeeded not out of any great "genius," but as a result of being relentless.

The "Dark" Side of Perseverance?

Some years back, I was having a rather long conversation with a friend about web marketing.

Calendula
Calendula with water droplets

In explaining my approach, and what I had accomplished, he countered with the question:

"Not to diminish what you've done, but has it ever crossed your mind that some of these never-developed projects with which you have created minor success really had no business EXISTING?"

His point being that the "average worker" might have looked at the same thing, declared "this is not viable" and moved on to something more readily developable. 

His secondary point being that I might have been far more successful in life if I'd taken on something "easier" rather than trying to dig something highly "dubious" out of the rubble and forcing it to become something.

The "Fear" of Having to Compete

Although it would have been easy for me to feel insulted by my friend's suggestion, I recognized the threads of truth in what he was saying.

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Red salvia

I have generally avoided fields, industries and lines of business that seemed "mainstream," instead choosing pretty marginal, esoteric, low volume and specialized areas.

I remember a line from a TED Talk I once watched where the presenter observed "Everyone knows that the easiest way to become a top influencer in your field is to choose a very small field!"

I recall laughing at that statement, and yet relating quite deeply to it. 

Following the conversation with my friend, I had to pause and take a long hard look at my approach to life, to goals, and especially to business.

I realized that I often chose the "marginal" and the "unknown" because I knew I would have little competition there.

My limited experience with "mainstream" work was one of being annihilated by the competition who had better resources, more charm, skills, knowledge, assertiveness or whatever. 

What's My Advantage?

My only tangible advantage or competitive edge — or so I felt — was the knowledge "Yeah, but I'm willing to work at this 80 hours a week for 10 years to make it succeed, and I know you're NOT!"

Purple flower
Purple flowering shrub

Which tends to be very true.

My "wake up call" was trying to embrace the idea that it actually wasn't "reasonable" — in "real world terms" — that someone need to work 80 hours a week for 10 years to get something to succeed.

Success — even marginal success — can be a lot easier than that.

I still struggle somewhat with a tendency to keep plugging away at things that should just have been left to die, but I'm getting better. And I've actually let go of a few marginal "pet projects" that I have been keeping "barely alive" for many years. A couple of them were blogs and web sites I abandoned after starting to blog on Steemit...

How About You? Do you have a specific "personal competitive edge?" Are you a very persistent person, or is it easy for you to let go of something as soon as it doesn't live up to expectations? Do you continue to work on projects you should really let go of? If you DO hang onto things that are not readily successful, why do you think you do so? Leave a comment-- share your experiences-- be part of the conversation!


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Created at 180522 13:17 PDT

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I think your friend was right. There are ways to have success and they go through exploiting existing hierarchies and systems.

I never cared for the mainstream and have only done well in marginalised subcultures, but I actually enjoy it and am very content that I am where I am. A good life and success are two different things for me.

Agreed. And I am far more interested in having a good life and a sense of contentment than "success."

I am too now, but when I was younger I was thinking a lot about this and somehow i just had to admit that I did not have it in me to go the mainstream way. Much happier now.

Your post reminds me of what my first painting prof told me once:
“The only way to succeed as an artist is to not quit.”
Very much so. I do question my decision of “still not quitting” every now and then. But it becomes less and less of an option as years pass by. In the meantime I witness my friends and colleagues get their “big breaks” early on, while I might not ever get one. But even these thoughts don’t really stop me because I also witness some of those colleagues and friends give up, once things start going slow.
Who knows, I might have already quit if I had experienced a “big break”, but nothing afterwards.

With art, it's also important to simply be passionate about what you're doing. If the desire to create is truly and deeply rooted in your blood and your soul, "sticking to it" becomes a lot easier.

Funny you should mention it; I wrote about that very thing ("not quitting") on our gallery's Steemit account yesterday:

https://steemit.com/art/@reddragonfly/art-and-creativity-did-you-keep-trying-long-enough

I am on a quest to discover how to learn to see things through.

This point in my life is a putting the bits back together time, previous times of my life have seen me both dedicated beyond reason and easily destracted by...well anything...Oh Squirrel!!!

Extremes ruled and balances were not maintained.

I am learning to walk my own road and I am curious to keep this discussion at the forefront for a bit... Thought provoking for certain.

The "easily distracted" part has always been a challenge for me. I am easily thrown off task by "shiny objects," and sometimes part of the reason I end up spending so much time on certain projects is precisely that I am trying to do TWO things simultaneously!

Your "TWO" makes me giggle... Definately a male/female brain divide on this one!

Meow! I'm a kitten I should not worry about just sleeping and eating hehehe =^-^=

Yes, sleeping is a good thing for cats!

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I think at some point in life you just start swinging and grasp at anything you can anymore if its been nothing but failures. There only so many failures you can handle in life where you keep putting in the time, waiting, trying more, waiting years, and nothing rewarding enough happens from your fruit of labor.

It’s easy to see people around you take the short cuts in life and they suddenly appear from the outside to be the success you always wanted. Expect, most times that just a lie. People want to appear to be successful even if it cost them that very success.

I do tend to hang onto projects for longer than I should. Far behind there reasonable amount of time and effort put in for the small rewards they yield. That is also why I occasionally reevaluate things. Just too many things to do and despite how many hours I give up sleeping it’s never enough. Sometimes you just have to let things go and move on.

Me gustó. Felicitaciones.